Monday, May 17, 2010

The words that should never be left unsaid..



Remember the time you were alone with someone you cared for. You felt so in love, and you wanted so much to say, “I love you." But you were shy. You held back. You didn’t say a word. And when you looked again, she had gone. You had let that moment, the best and only time to say it, slip by. The magical moment, gone forever.

You watched your best friend on stage. He was flawless. His performance was remarkable. When you saw him backstage, you pretended to be composed, and all you said was, “OK!” But what you really wanted to do was hug him and jump about in overflowing admiration, and scream, “You were great! You were so fantastic! I’m so proud of you!” But you didn’t say it. You held back. Later you realized your best friend would have appreciated you more, and felt more elated if you had said the words you felt like saying.

How many times have you found yourself regretting that you didn’t speak out the love, admiration, sympathy, or joy that you really felt? How many times did you want to believe the moment will come again, but had to accept that chances are it never will? How many times did you go to bed repeating to yourself, “I should have said...”?

It takes a little presence of mind to grab these pockets of space and time that give us the opportunity to say the words that should not be left unsaid. We all understand that these precious moments present themselves briefly. And we all know that as brief as they are, these are the times we must recognize as rare opportunities for us to express how much we care.

Yes, words that say how much we care - that is the only reason we cannot afford to let the moment slip by. The words are short and simple. They can be said over and over again. They never lose their meaning. No one tires of hearing them. And their impact is enhanced when said at the right moment. These are the simple but powerful words that should never be left unsaid.

Compliment. Everyone loves a good compliment. The best moment is when there are a lot of people around. Say it promptly, say it aloud. “You’re looking good!” “Nice hair!” “Black suits you well!” “Your nails are gorgeous!” “Did you lose weight?” “Cool car!” “You must tell me where you bought those shoes!”

Reinforce. It sounds like a compliment, but it’s more of a reinforcement or affirmation of something someone did well. “That was a nice thing to say.” “Your performance was flawless!” “You were incredible out there!” “Hey, I couldn’t have done it better!” “This is a masterpiece! Can you give me a copy?” “When I grow up I want to be like you.”

Empathize. Share feelings. If you were in his shoes, what words would you like to hear? “You must be very proud of your kids!” “I’m so happy for you.” “This is so exciting!” “I’m enjoying this. Let’s do this more often.”

Sympathize. Show compassion. Be there and comfort. Condole. “I understand how you feel.” “It’s all right.” “You’ll be fine.” “Things will work out. Don’t worry.”

Apologize. This takes not only timing, but also sincerity. An apology is one of the most powerful words that should never be left unsaid. It heals wounds, mends broken hearts, and brings back what otherwise would have been needlessly lost forever. Be sorry. Be honest. And say it. “I’m sorry.” “Please forgive me.” “It’s my fault. It will never happen again.”

Express. Translate expressions of love and happiness to words. The right moment presents itself all the time. Grab it before it goes away. Say how much you care. Express how happy you are. Share the feeling. Put it in words. “I really enjoy shopping with you.” “It’s so nice to see you again.” “I’m so glad I work here.” “I’m very proud of you, my son.” “I love you very much.”

Appreciate. And don’t forget the most important words of all, the words that express appreciation, goodwill, and caring, the words that one can never have too much of, and therefore should never, ever, be left unsaid to family, friends, colleagues and strangers, “Thank you.”

And, finally, never forget, on a daily basis, to acknowledge Allah and give thanks to Him for everything in your life.

I copied this from The words that should never be left unsaid By Ruby Bayan-Gagelonia but had been edited by me


3 comments:

Cik Puan Mira said...

and i want to say: I miss you la my dear cbah! huhu
kalo la i byk duit.. akan ku terbang ke sana.. poya2 dgn u hehe

naseebah (asfal awliya') said...

huhuhu....i miss u 2 laling...kalo i ada kad kredit senangla beli tikat murah utk u mai sini...malangnya..i xda kad kredit..huhuhu...sabor..nnti i pulang berjumpa dgn u and kekasih-kekasih i yang lain...muahahahaha... banyak sungguh kekasih i..kat rumah ja ada tiga orang...

saiza said...

u know wat..
ermm when read dis,,im gonna to cry out
huhu its so touch my dear


p/s: miss dis moment